The Ring of Judgment

I briefly made acquaintance with my new roommate and I have most of the move boxes of the past sorted out, the room I have is big enough to place the minimal stuff.

The city I live isn’t very big but enough to get the general impression of what cities are about, everything is close and for comfort and ease – but many people become deluded, living closer yet more secluded and cut off from each other.

Mainly the entire economy of a city and what is being offered is based on make-believe, the interests and opinions have become divided in cities and especially within this context the box-mind is developed of different people associating with different groups and express that through clothing and behaviorism although I’d say clothing is in a real sense the manifestation of behavior.

The last couple of days I have found that my main way of internalizing problems and everything I experience through self judgment and judgment, a way of intellectualizing everything in a way where it is either right or wrong and trying to maintain a balance or exercise a form of control to maintain a sense of righteousness so in lesser words a way of justifying my experience of myself which is a process of internalization.

This cannot continue as I am not a judge of myself or of anything or anyone else, also my sense of what is right and wrong is fabricated and is not a practical way of looking in the moment here what has to be done, it even stops my actions because of judgment of it in advance and creating an opinion and deluded point of view from where all my actions are derived. I do not allow self judgment any longer.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as right or wrong

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to believe I need to be right

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to think I need to compensate myself in terms of my past

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to form an image of myself that I hold as who I am and that I need to correct or justify instead of correcting myself in the moment Here

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from myself through forming an image of myself by judging myself

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to participate with the image of myself that I have created of myself through creating definitions of right and wrong

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to think there is a right way

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to manipulate myself through knowledge

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to manipulate others through knowledge

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to give value and importance to knowledge, not realizing I am merely using knowledge to justify my experience of myself which is unacceptable

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to justify what I observe through saying that I know

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself that knowing holds any meaning whatsoever

I forgive myself for not having allowed myself to remain within the physical here

 

I Am Here as who I am Here as what I accept and allow myself to become within every moment of every breath

I Am Directly Responsible for Me

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